my favorite person.
Serenity - the state of being calm, peaceful, and untroubled.
"what does your tattoo mean?"
“why did you get a song lyric as your tattoo?”
“are you that obsessed with Demi that you’d get her tattoo?”
I don’t think any tattoo will ever mean as much to me as this one. I don’t think I ever had an “easy life” or “perfect family” from having such bad memories with my step dad; emotional, verbal and physical abuse. To coping with not eating to taking it out on myself in more ways than imaginable. To the scars I have to see everyday on my arms. To the constant meltdowns because of my step father. To all the pain he’s brought upon my mom, brother and I. To having to stay at a domestic violence shelter this past summer. To having to be observed in a mental hospital for 24 hours because of the constant meltdowns and depression. To slowly recovering with outpatient treatment. To all the things I’ve gone through the past 17 years.
"I’m a survivor, in more ways than you know"
Finally took my tiki necklace off, and its not going on anymore. I’m tired of living in the past. After 2 years of wearing that necklace. I’m done. I’m officially moved on from you. The last piece of you I had left is gone. For good.
Things are different now. Completely different. I see you, and I just don’t know who you are anymore. I used to know you so well. But now its like I learn something different everyday. I know it seems like a million years ago that we were together. You’re over it, and maybe it doesn’t mean anything to you anymore. It probably doesn’t and thats okay. I’ve learn a lot of things in the past year. You’ve made me so much stronger. You’ve broken me down so much. But I’m still here. I was really sad about it for months. The worst kind of sad. The kind where you know that theres nothing you can do about the situation. We would walk right past eachother like nothing. Nobody would ever guess that at one point we were completely inlove with eachother. I’d always ask myself how you could ignore me after everything we’ve been through. But day by day, I’d cry less. I wouldnt think about you as much, and day by day, you’d become more and more of my past. I dont think you’ll ever grasp how much you meant to me. You were the first guy I trusted completely, and gave my all to, and I don’t let people in that easy. You were always somehow there. I fell so hard for you. But I’ve learned to get up. A couple months ago, i’d still drop anything for you. But now its just not like that. Its not about you anymore. I hope you have a nice life. And I hope one day we can be friends again. And lastly, I hope you dont forget the good days you had with me.